My Flickr Pics

christajtodd. Get yours at bighugelabs.com

18 April 2017

A Tale of Reawakening...

Come sit a spell and allow me to tell you a tale....
A tale of life...
A tale of challenges...
A tale of survival...
A tale of timid faith and haphazard quiet times...
A tale of busy...
A tale of overwhelmed...
A tale of an uncomfortable wake up call....
....a wake up call that was not the first....

A tale of how out of love for His daughter God began his chat with a gentle whisper....
A tale that has resulted in a mighty shove...
A tale of a busy young lady too busy to listen...
A tale of an invert scare to listen.....
... Scared?!....
....Yep!....
...for it is a tale of someone scared that He will ask more than she "can" give.

It's one of those times in life when you look back over the recent past and wonder how you didn't see it...
A job I needed to leave but didn't have the heart too... I loved my patients, their families, and my coworkers too much.  In my last year there.....
In February: median nerve injury resulting in significant time out of work and lasting deficits that are still present.
In August: severe concussion resulting in significant time out of work, increased stress at work near constant naps under my desk in between patients, cognitive confusion, vestibular issues, migraine, and so much more...... also lasting deficits ... still present...... Resulting in a second round of vestibular PT, cognitive therapy, lists all over my home, and a planner designed for someone with dementia :)
Did I mention October the year before was a large ovarian mass requiring surgery and significant time out of work. 
...and  yet...
...too chicken to leave.  Surely working your hardest and it never being good enough causing you to be miserable in a setting you know is better than beginning at a new location.  My decision to leave was abrupt.  I had been praying about it intensely for a week -- as well as asking friends to pray with me.  That day I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I was not meant to be there longer.  I had given my skills, my talents, my gifts, and part of me.  A big part of me.  It was confirmed that evening by several friends.

Did I take time away to fully heal? No.  Money runs the world.  Just because my brain couldn't retrieve basic words from my vocabulary and vestibular deficits caused (cause) me to feel as if I am constantly on a boat......
... rent is still due...
... electricity and water are required...
... food is occasionally necessary.....

....and  so....
I went back to teaching (with major modifications) and took on a new challenge as a pediatric PT.  I have no doubt it is where I was supposed to be at that time but also have no doubt it wasn't where God planned for me to stay.  

.... this current break has resulted in....
... a consistent Quiet Time...
... blind and terrifying Faith and trust that He's got me...
... time to address the deficits that cause me to feel like a fish out of water...
... deficits that at times scare me....

A time to sleep (my body gives me no choice).... neurons require rest for restoration....
A time to reassess the dreams I have always had and not recently acknowledged. 
A time to re-evaluate my priorities.

As a young child --- for as long as I can remember --- I wanted to be a doctor.
My goal was to work for Doctors Without Borders. 

The pull of love for family/friends and need to be closer pulls me in one direction.
The deep ache and yearning in my heart pulls me toward far away lands and those less fortunate.
A dream of being able (financially and time) to do the jobs I love (PT and Education) while also participating in medical missions and philanthropic activities. 

God put part of the answer in front of me 2 years ago.  
Two years ago I was waiting on my essential oil premium starter kit to arrive.
I was excited because then my sister would quit telling me it would be good for me...
Little did I know what God had planned....

There is not a day that I don't use essential oils...emotional support, sleep support, body system support, chemical free cleaning, chemical free living, facial/skin products, and an improved sense of gratitude for the plants, herbs, fruits, and flowers that God has provided for us to use for healthier living.

2 years ago my older sister was oily and I was awaiting a kit with plans to use Thieves to support my immune system.  My parents had no interest in oils......

Present day... My sister is still oily... I am the oily lady people send their friends to for education and support.... My mom is oily and frequently telling me of new uses for oils ..... and the biggest surprise?.. my dad is now oily.  He wants the diffuser each night, has several rollers for different purposes, and recently learned how well essential oils can support the musculoskeletal system. 

I resisted in the beginning.  How could I possibly share my love for this amazing thing I had found? He reminded me that one of my gifts in Education.  I love to teach!  I love to learn new things and watch the excitement on someone else discovering their own abilities and uses for essential oils.

I don't know where it will lead but I do know that God has ordained this.  He handed it to me 2 years ago and I ignored it....  Business pages are going into my old lady planner and this girl is going to share the love!

What has he placed right in front of you?  What are you missing?